暗夜獨白

In the sound of snoring, I shall be contented.  Everything shall be fine except my eyes cannot be closed, my mind cannot be shut.

so, let it open.

 

我的感覺好像封了厚厚的塵。任由自己的心被麻木,讓感受在下一秒鐘被遺忘。茉莉花,利比亞,菜園,只有暗暗地留心,為旁人的事情默默地記念,別人的喜悅就在心裏祝福,感激也不言於溢表,沉默地成就現代人類社會裏日漸蔓延的一大罪惡*。

感受…是否人大了,就會失去感受的能力?還是說,人大了就會失去對感受的表達能力?抑或是人大了,就更會把自己的感受保護起來?我不懂,我只是會在不經意的情況下為自己的感受流露一點痕跡。若果以facebook的形式表達,應該如下:

1. 其實,不講自己感受的原因是因為常感到其他人講感受時並不是真正的感受,而真正的感受反而會被包裝成觀點與角度的邏輯

2. 其實,面對越大的掙扎反而更難宣之於口,面對越抽象的掙扎亦如是

3. 其實,我狐疑大家的感受都得來自工作,家庭和生活嗎?當大家所表達的都離不開這個框框,大家真正的感受應該是苦悶吧?

4. 其實,我好想說請大家為之前所提及的item祈禱,因為他們是我們的鄰舍。不要以為大家去遍傳,全組人去服事就覺得足夠

5. 其實,我是在為星期六小組被別人寫的優點缺點作著無謂的註腳,說無謂是因為這些點只構成三分一個我(你對我的認知,我的自我觀感和真正的我)。

……

黑夜將要過去,在上路之前就將這些不完整的都留在黑暗中,等待別人的腳步自行踐踏。

 

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*「我非常討厭說謊。說謊和沉默可以說是現代人類社會裡日漸蔓延的兩大罪惡。事實上,我們經常說謊,動不動就沉默不語。」—村上春樹

 

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The new beginning

Trashed my blog when I upgrade my wordpress to 3.04.  I know I have no way to blame anyone because I didn’t do the backup before the auto-upgrade.

On the other hand, this is my new entry after the new year, and after the beginning of my new life.  I don’t know how to present this (at least not in this unfortunate way).  Though every time, it’s those unfortunate events call me to move on, call me to take off my past and accept new challenges, appreciate new faces, new items, prepare them to be my next precious.

I will try to dig my historical posts from my hard disks, however, this blog will never be the same – This is the beginning of another story.

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Hello world!

Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!

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